Wow. Ytd was really something. Who would have thought right? I mean the day started out pretty ok. Went to school to meet jasper, then slack around with mima. Then play with my kids when they were released from lessons. I had a good feeling bout the team. Then yeah the usual and boarded the bus go farrer park. The trip there was more quiet than i expected but still good.
We reached there earliest and did our warm up and stuff. The field is so lousy and muddy leh and definitely smaller than normal. So it was quite worrying. Then vj came and our match started. It was drizzling and i took that as a good sign. Means i will be less tired. Which is totally not true. I was doing my job as best as i could but it wasn't enough. I was effectively stopping all the balls with my body and foot. The shots kept richocheting off me and when i turned quickly, expecting another one, it caught me offguard and touched my hand. In the penalty box. And like duh the shot went in we had a j1 keeper. Not to mention all our keepers have a reputation for having no confidence. I was preparing to be subbed out already coz i did real bad and i was tired out already so early. But stubbornly he refused. By half time we were 4 down and i was a wreck. My disappointment in myself coupled with my exhaustion plus other problems made me too tired to even drink and i was on the verge of tears. Yes this was the worst match in my entire life. And still i was in.
The second half wasn't as bad. But my leg finally gave in to the cramp after a clearance. And then yeah the match ended and it was quite devastating you know. I was quite sad too coz i thought i disappointed so many seniors who took time off to come and watch us. And coach too. But i was really angry and disappointed in my teammates as well. Haiz. I missed my 1st kids! And we went to meet one of them hehe. Jolene!! Lolx miss her so much. Seeing her gave me some stress reliever. Haiz well at least my seniors were there and gave me moral support. I miss them alot too!!! Well at least going home was fun. Had the feeling of last year u know. The simple joy. Even though the bus was small, the company was just right hehe. And cara gave me this really cute tortoise! Hehehe hang it on my bag now.
I have almost come to terms with the loss but my guilty conscience is still there. Not to mention the cramp in my leg reminding me of everything. Every step is so painful la. Stupid principal dun let us train see la. Someone else could really have been hurt. Haiz so im stuck now with studying for computing and a cramped leg. Oh yeah but last night, my 2 favourite songs played back to back on the radio! What a coincidence right hehe. So little things make me real happy. Didn't sleep well last night though. In fact for the whole week. Izzit coz im stressed, or tired or what? Just hope that wun disappoint anyone anymore. The enxt 5 matches will be winning all the way!
Oh yeah. And due to some unforeseen circumstances. My name is Eugene Milo Tan. Wish me luck for computing!